I've been waking up feeling hungover, which might not surprise you after all the gin-and-a-funnel jokes I've been making---but in fact I HAVEN'T been drinking, because my years working in a pharmacy solidly convinced me of the idea that tranquilizers and alcohol don't mix well (Customer: "Can I drink alcohol with these?" Pharmacist, cheerfully: "Depends on how you feel about waking up!"), and I'd rather have the tranquilizers than the liquor, especially since liquor tends to leave me wide awake at 3:00 in the morning imagining people breaking into the house.
Besides, I don't seem to get hungover, and in fact usually feel BETTER than usual in the morning after drinking. This was confusing until I found a list of alcohol withdrawal symptoms (which includes hangover symptoms, since that's what a hangover mostly IS) that included positive symptoms such as good mood. That's a nice deal I got from the genetic pool, isn't it? Except that then when I wake up feeling lousy, I think "Dang, should've had more to drink last night."
Where was I? Oh, yes, I've been waking up feeling lousy, but I said "feeling hungover" even though for me that would be an inaccurate description of the feeling, because I know what "feeling hungover" means in the usual parlance and wanted to use communication to communicate an idea TO YOU, rather than TO MYSELF, so I used words in their usual meaning instead of pretending that I can make words mean anything I want them to mean and then act incredulous that people are misunderstanding me. Still, I guess I could have achieved the same effect by saying "feeling lousy." It was more that I ALSO wanted to clarify that it WASN'T that I was hungover, and so calling it "feeling hungover" right off the bat seemed a cleaner and less defensive segue into the "not actually hungover" clarification than if I'd said "feeling lousy" and then followed it by saying "BUT IT'S NOT A HANGOVER, SO SHUT UP."
I've lost my place again. Okay, so I've been waking up feeling lousy, and then feeling kind of crummy on and off all day. Part of it is the despair caused by the issues of yesterday's post, and let's not even link to it, okay? I don't want to open it up and see parts of it again, and I'd have to do that to make the link.
Part of it is Elizabeth still crying every morning before school.
Part of it is that Edward has started crying AFTER school, saying that he CAN'T GET HIS WORK DONE in class because EVERYONE IS TOO LOUD; and also we got a notice from the speech therapist at school saying he's way behind with his speech even after being in therapy all last year; and also I got a call from the doctor yesterday saying that his second set of blood work came back and he's still anemic, so they need to see him next week.
Part of it is that Rob's voice is changing and his skin is looking dicey and I have a top-of-the-rollercoaster feeling about this upcoming stage of parenthood.
Part of it is that William went to the dentist for a cleaning/check and now the dentist wants to discuss (1) orthodontia, (2) speech therapy, and (3) a tonsillectomy.
Part of it is that Henry has been in a particularly careeny/uncareful stage (he's ALWAYS like this, but even more so recently) and that, combined with his INCESSANT TALKING, is wearing on my nerves and making me feel like I can't focus---and then I'm also continually being startled by loud crashes.
Part of it is that our dishwasher has been broken, and I finally got myself to do something about it when I found out to my delight that the dishwasher repair place HAD AN EMAIL ADDRESS FOR SERVICE---and after I emailed them, they CALLED ME BACK to make the appointment, even though (1) I hadn't given my phone number, which means they had to go to the trouble of looking it up when they could have just hit reply, and (2) IF I CONTACT BY EMAIL, THAT MEANS I WANT TO TALK BY EMAIL. Plus, now there will be an expensive stranger in my house sometime today.
Part of it is that I'm reading Joan Didion's? new book? and it seems like? every single sentence? is an unanswerable question? and it's giving me a headache?
Part of it could be too much sugar and/or too much caffeine, taken in the attempt to combat the Feeling Lousy.
And of course I'm worried about my Sims family.
NONE of this is a big deal. EVERY SINGLE ITEM on this list falls into totally routine LIFE. And there is no reason I can't cope with it, and I AM in fact coping with it. But I think it's like how when you're doing something big on the computer, like a big download or upload or something, and then everything else runs all sluggishly: the computer is handling it, but it's not running at its usually brisk cheery pace. That's how I've been feeling: SLUGGISH, and as if I have a large program constantly running in my background.
Life-improving products, part 4 - (Continued from part 1, part 2, and part 3.) Stearns Youth Life Vest (photo from Amazon.com). I’d been too scared to take the kids to any body of water oth...