Here is the dilemma. Our son Rob, age 13, got an invitation to a friend's 14th birthday party barbecue. And when I say "invitation," I don't mean a paper card, I mean the friend told him about it. We drove him to the party at 4:00, and when I say "we," I mean Paul.
Originally I was going to drive him, and my plan was to go up to the house, introduce myself to the parents, get a magical feeling that everything was okay and that our views on supervision of teenagers was compatible, exchange phone numbers with the parents, and ask when to pick Rob up.
But what Paul did was drop him off in the driveway, waving to a distant adult as he did so. So! We don't know when the party ends! We don't know ANYTHING!
Keeping in mind that Paul is SORRY, and also that he couldn't have our usual Saturday Night Drinks because one of us had to be completely dry to go pick up Rob later and that got to be Paul because he cheesed things up---keeping all that in mind, what would YOU do? Would you...wait to get a call from Rob, somehow? Go back to the house at a certain time and just...see if the party is over? This is new territory for us, and we're not sure if Rob would feel comfortable asking to use the host's phone, or if Rob would know to take an "Okay, the party is over now" hint, or what the protocol is for 14-year-old parties.
Update: What we did was wait until about 7:45 (assuming in the meantime that Rob would be capable of calling us from the host's phone if necessary, and wishing he'd remembered to bring one of the family cell phones with him), and then Paul drove over there---but with a casual attitude, ready to hear something like, "They're right in the middle of a movie" or whatever, at which point he would have said, "Okay! When should I come back for him?" Instead, his timing was very good: kids were still hanging around, but a couple had already been picked up, so it was fine for Rob to leave with him right then.
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