July 15, 2012

Cherry Stem; Skirted Swimsuits

I admit that being able to neatly de-pit a cherry in my closed mouth is not the same kind of talent as being able to tie a cherry stem into a knot under similar circumstances. But aren't we getting tired of the cherry stem trick anyway? What is that trick intended to communicate? "If there is any sense in which you can compare your proportions to a cherry stem, have I got an experience for you"?

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Elizabeth has gotten it into her head that two-piece swimsuits ALWAYS have skirts, and that if they DON'T, that they are extremely embarrassing. A one-piece doesn't have to have a skirt: that's fine by her. And she doesn't like any two-piece suit that shows any skin between the two pieces, so her two-piece suits are basically just one-piece suits cut in half for bathroom-break convenience. BUT THEY MUST HAVE SKIRTS. Otherwise ICK!! She was a little startled by me not knowing this already.

I was a little annoyed, because I bought her a number of suits last year on good clearances, and none of the two-piece ones have skirts. But I am not fully annoyed, because when you pay $3.24 for a swimming suit, one of the upsides is that it's not a big deal if it doesn't fit or if the child hates it or IF IT TURNS OUT THERE IS AN UNWRITTEN RULE ABOUT SKIRTS.

19 comments:

Dinsdale said...

I, um, can do the cherry stem trick. Spoiler: it involves using your teeth. So sexy, I know. /sarcasm

Gigi said...

*sigh* Kids and their arbitrary rules about clothing....

Suburban Correspondent said...

Enjoy it while you can. My teen daughter would rather have died a lingering death than to have worn a skirted bottom.

HereWeGoAJen said...

I totally remember how those things were SO important to me growing up. I felt that socks that were anything other than pure white were totally embarrassing. My mom bought me some with a green line across the toe and I spent the next year or so refusing to ever take my shoes off in public. Now I think white socks with colored bits are actually pretty cute.

Sarah said...

See, and I grew up being FORCED to wear skirted bottoms for modesty or whatever and came to see it as being akin to having to wear an Amish headcovering- so much so in fact that even years later, as a thick-thighed woman who looks her best in a skirted bottom BY FAR, it still pains me to buy one. And I have to, yes HAVE TO, pair it with a bikini top so that I am still announcing to the world, "I do not have bathing suit/modesty rules to follow! I am just wearing this skirt for vanity's sake!"

Anonymous said...

FYI--the BEST place to buy swimsuits for girls (in my opinion) is at Lands End. And they have exactly what she is looking for--tankinis that show no skin between and skirted bottom options. And they are having a swim sale right now!!

Lauren said...

I have no idea why the cherry stem trick is considered sexy but I did learn to do it in college. Now the only people who are impressed are my 4 and 6-yr-olds.

And I second the Lands End recommendation. They have great suits and good sales.

Nicole said...

Swistle, if we did not have rules, it would be anarachy.

ALL HAIL SKIRTED TWO-PIECES.

Kenner said...

Would she be amenable to simply ADDING a skirt to an existing 2 piece? Or does it have to be attached? Because you could probably buy a little swim skirt cover-up (they have them for grown ups, I'd imagine they have them for kids, too!)

Mrs. Irritation said...

Speaking of cherries - my friend just bought this cherry pitter for Sofie and it has been SUCH a hit. It's pretty adorable.

http://www.amazon.com/Talisman-Designs-Cherry-Chomper-Pitter/dp/B001Q9EK1Y/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1342375752&sr=8-5&keywords=cherry+pitter

Swistle said...

Kenner- YES, she would find that acceptable! What I'm hoping is to find a 3-piece, where the skirt is a color that would go with all her other 2-piece suits!

Wendy said...

My daughter has this set and thinks it's the definition of awesome. And since the skirt is separate, maybe it would complement some of the existing 2-pieces?

http://www.target.com/p/xhilaration-girls-3-piece-tankini-set-pink/-/A-13778461?reco=Rec_pdp_13778461_PopularProductsInCategory_Banner

Swistle said...

Wendy- AAAAA!! THAT IS THE VERY ONE I HAVE IN MY ONLINE TARGET CART!!

Shalini said...

Me, mouthbreathing, "Is the cherry stem supposed to be a...part of the body? No! That's not right! *rereads* Is it?" I should not read blogs right after exercise.

MomQueenBee said...

Hey! The cherry stem trick is intended to communicate that I am purely AWESOME. Also, it ensures I get the cherry out of every Sonic drink in the car because my Boys never believe I can do it, in which case it is intended to communicate that they are wrong.

Alexicographer said...

Oh, ugh: my little one is just reaching the age where he has opinions about his attire , something we had managed to avoid until this point. I. Don't. Like. It.

Hotch Potchery said...

I could do the cherry thing in high school and once I showed my Dad because I was VERY naive and he was furious and forbade me from ever doing it again.

cakeburnette said...

I can do the cherry stem trick, too...but it's about as far from sexy as you can get. I'm with you, I never could figure out why that trick was supposed to be hot. The way I do it (my husband, too), I just look spastic.

Kira said...

I have not thought about the cherry stem thing since I was so young that I took it as the God's honest truth that it was sexy...because...YOU know.
I did not know, so I nodded knowingly, and I never thought about it again until now. But you're right - what is the practical application there? Even if the part in question was similarly sized, it's my understanding that no man wants theirs tied in knots.