I am a little DISCOURAGED today. I have another UTI (and if you want to ask me why I always, ALWAYS feel the need to share this particular diagnosis with you, I have NO ANSWER to that question), and having a UTI is like being nauseated or like having a backache: it is really hard to focus on ANYTHING ELSE. And furthermore, when I feel like I badly need to pee, I also feel IRRITABLE, and I have been feeling that way since yesterday afternoon, so I have a lot of irritable stocked up.
I'm also discouraged because I thought THIS TIME the doctor would do something about this, because LAST TIME she said that NEXT TIME we'd do something about this, and I was hoping "do something" would mean "give you a fill-as-needed prescription"---but instead she did NOT do something about this and said NEXT TIME we would.
Furthermore, our insurance doesn't want to pay for the entire cost of the lab work, and I don't even blame them: according to the doctor, the lab work is to find out if the strain is resistant to the antibiotic they prescribed. I can see how that would be important in some situations, but in MY case, I think it's one of the many markers of What Is Wrong With Health Care. It's $450 for that lab work. I pay $150; my insurance pays $300---money it collected from us and from everyone else paying in. TO FIND OUT IF IT'S THE RIGHT ANTIBIOTIC. Which we could also find out for free, by waiting.
And it's just ROUTINE, it's just AUTOMATIC that this amount of money is spent, EVERY TIME I go in for one of these. I'm picturing that money as little dots on a map, little $300 symbols pinging pointlessly out of insurance accounts across the nation as each person with a UTI pees in a cup. And on a personal level, I am seeing those little $150 symbols pinging out of my bank account every time it's my personal cup.
And perhaps you are wondering why I don't just decline to have this test done, to which I reply with a blank look, because I am wondering what it might be like to live that way. I even totally worked up my courage once and resisted the lab work for several back-and-forth dialog exchanges with the doctor, explaining (1) that I thought the test was unnecessary and (2) that I was willing to take the risk of not having that test done and (3) that it was not an amount of money I considered unimportant, and the end result was that she continued to argue back at me and so the lab work was done, so I don't really want to talk anymore about it and you are just going to have to chalk this up to a temperament component that looks unlikely to change. Maybe the day will come when I can handle more than three volleys of the ball while arguing with a medical professional about her medical opinions vs. my "this is what SEEMS like it would be the case" opinions, but that day was not today. Oh, I can do it in my head, sure! But whenever I imagine applying that script to an actual conversation with an actual doctor who will then respond to what I said rather than blushing and stammering and agreeing with my finely-put point, it does not work out.
Gift ideas for an 8-year-old, part 2 of 2 - Last week I talked about the gifts we were getting/considering for Edward, who is turning 8 next month. This week it’s Elizabeth’s turn: not “girl gifts,” ...