November 5, 2010

Summary

For those who don't follow me on Twitter (and for heaven's sake, why NOT? I alternately bore you and stress you!), here is a recap of what happened:

Paul's Mother: *dies*

Paul's sister Beth: Awesome, I'll keep living in the Mother's 3-bedroom house, but now I don't have to pay her rent anymore! Also, I'll keep her 2-year-old Camry, because in addition to having my roommates kick me out, I never bought a car!

(A year goes by.)

Paul: Hey, Beth, the lawyer says it's time to figure out how to divide the estate!

Beth: Okay! How about I keep the house but you take out a mortgage with me to pay for the repairs?

Swistle: *reads appraisal* *realizes repairs will FAR EXCEED value of house* *panics*

Paul: Wait. How about you keep the house and the car and I keep the stocks and cash? My half will be much less, but I'd like you to have what you need.

Beth: But it would be beneficial for me to keep the house and also the stocks and also the cash, plus have you paying for half the repairs on the house, even though those repairs will cost more than the value of the house. You'll get half the selling price of the house, but we won't sell it until I die! Plus, you can get a really good rate on a mortgage right now!

Paul: We're not co-owning the house. Either you take it as part of your half of the estate, or we sell it.

Beth: Okay, fine, I'll pay the taxes, because I'm sure that's your issue with co-owning the house, and we'll co-own the house, and you'll pay half the repairs but get no benefit. Also, I'll keep the stocks, because those would be beneficial for me in my retirement. Also, don't worry, we'll use the cash from the estate to pay to make the house better for me, so you can wait to take out that mortgage!

Swistle: *panics*

Paul: I realize it would be beneficial for you to have half the stocks AND live in the house I'm half-paying for, but that's would not be in ANY WAY "beneficial" for ME, dumbass.

Swistle: *realizes sister-in-law is out of her head, and that a lawyer will probably need to be involved*

Beth: Okay! I'm suddenly and inexplicably being reasonable! I'll take the house and the car as my half!


********


Paul's interpretation of these inexplicable events: She wasn't DELIBERATELY cheesing us, she just hadn't thought it through! But now she has!

Swistle's interpretation: She is THIRTY-FOUR. She is able to comprehend these things. So either this is a trap (eg., she found gold buried in the back yard, or discovered the crazily low appraisal (($25,000 for house and property)) was dramatically wrong), or there is something unpleasant coming (eg., it will turn out she still thinks she gets the estate cash to repair the house and/or that we'll pay for future repairs), or she vented to someone who said to her "ARE YOU NUTS??," or she's had a stroke, or she thought there was no harm in TRYING to get the entire inheritance but backed off as soon as Paul showed backbone.

********

In any case, it's not over until the estate is settled. I'm not counting ANY chickens.

32 comments:

Christina said...

Ok I know this is horrible, but I love the way you opened the scene. You need to become a playwrite Swistle!

Pigeon said...

i have been following this on twitter with great interest. Can't wait to see what she does next. And I agree, her suddenly being all agreeable makes me think she has found buried treasure in the backyard or some such thing.

Bell said...

O_o

...

o_O

...

O_O

Doxie said...

Yep...you're so right. The eggs could contain vultures, hawks, or even turtles...hmmm don't you wish you could read what was in someone's mind?

Temerity Jane said...

I have LOVED following this story. I love stories about people's dealings with audaciously outrageous people. I mean, not that I'm glad you're going through this, but it is GOOD BLOGGING.

ComfyMom~Stacey said...

I'm going with option 3. People like her are always going to try, right up to the very end to get it all going their way & they will take you for everything you let them.

Jana said...

Oh my....you're living in a real life soap opera!

Anonymous said...

Does Paul's sister have a job? Because I'm fairly certain she's my boss, or a VERY reasonable facsimile.

Which is why I'm leaving this comment anonymously. But I totally hope you can use Paul's ninja trickery to see who I am behind the scenes.

Shannon said...

I'm with Paul here, some people just don't think things through, and automatically assume that whatever is best for them is obviously what's best for the situation. They just don't have the capacity to analytically approach a situation, and see how things could affect someone else. No internal fair-o-meter.

Swistle said...

Anonymous- Sadly I turned off the Ninja Application because it was screwing with people's ability to leave comments. But yes, she does have a job, and in fact she has two, and wouldn't it be TOTALLY INSANE if you KNEW HER!! (Please don't tell her, please don't tell her, please don't tell her....)

Nicole said...

Oh good lord. Dealing with family estates - especially when family is, um, STUPID - is very very difficult.

Anonymous said...

I grew up with a younger sister who would *push* ANY situation, almost to the point of aggression. When I would finally, feebly object, she would say, "I just thought I would try that. All you had to do was say 'no'." AAARGH.

Anonymous said...

p.s. And she is still certifiable, at age 67...GOOD LUCK.

Caitlin said...

Oh lord. Well. I'm glad this is finally swinging back in a sane direction, and that REASON and RATIONALITY (uh, rationalness?) have come into the center of the ring and laid all their cards out on the table.

But, uh, I'll be over here in the corner with this tub of popcorn to watch how the rest of it plays out. Good luck, and godspeed!

Tess said...

Honestly, I did not comment before because I thought you were overreacting a little, and the sister was being misrepresented. BUT, BUT that was when I thought the "plan" was to sell the house in good condition after the repairs are done. I am of the mindset, that property, no matter how run down has potential. So in my mind, she was just overseeing repairs and helping to fix up the house. Now that I realize she was planning on living there for the rest of her natural life, I realize, Girl is Crazy. I am so sorry you are having to deal with this, Swistle. I hope things work out for the best for everyone involved, and you all can still remain as close as you were before.

cd0103 said...

Oh my. I may have to add you to the Twitter I never check just to see your updates, but honey, there has to be a lawyer involved for your side because your husband doesn't want confrontation and your S-I-L is crazy. Bless your heart.

Anonymous said...

Yes - once you get a lawyer and a judge involved, the craziness won't matter.

And YEAH you want it all - who don't?? And good luck with that. ::sighing::

This sounds totally like what could happen in my family - they are NUTS TOO.

Clarabella said...

I hate to be pessimistic, but if you already have an attorney (for other civil matters: will, etc.), I might *retain* him for this situation. Just in case.
That said, I will be optimistic and hope that your very last idea of what happened (rationality prevailed) IS actually what happened. Obviously, I don't know what kind of sibling relationship she & Paul have, but maybe she was just pushing it to see if she could.
Good for y'all for standing up for yourselves (not that I doubted you would, no matter how much you might seem to hate confrontation :)
Good luck, lady.

Suzanne said...

I'm going to go with "found gold buried in the back yard". But you know what? Even if that's true it would take a LOT of gold to make this situation worth fighting over. I'm glad she at least *seems* to be acting more reasonably.

Also, for the record, everyone I've ever met has a crazy family member like this. You're lucky yours is only an in-law - mine is my mother's sister, who at the age of 55+ only moved out of her (rent free) parent's house under GREAT protest after they were both admitted to assisted living for dementia/Alzheimer care and our family needed the money from selling the house to help pay for it. Also, she took their car. Her brother took the other one.

So, yeah. When they're sucky, families are REALLY sucky.

Marie Green said...

Wait, is that Tess up there... "our" Tess? Because "as close as you were before" is COMEDIC GOLD.

Also, I have been stressed about this since you first started writing about it, but this? This was a FUNNY "summary". And (please don't punch me in the face for saying this) but it sort of made me realize that I, ah, have missed (just a little bit) the Crazy MIL Stories.

Superjules said...

I dunno, it's stuff like this that makes me panic EVEN MORE. Before, she was just being unreasonable and kind of a bitch (too strong a word?) but now she's also UNPREDICTABLE.

Anonymous said...

I, as well, am very interested in these stories, if only because we get to know you better! However, aren't you scared that she reads these?

Swistle said...

Anonymous- Yes. I mean, the rule of the internet is that you're supposed to write as if the person you're secretly writing about is reading it. But the venting is so worth it, and I guess my HOPE is that if she DID read it, it would explain the situation to her better than we've been able to so far. (Ha ha, who am I kidding? My hope would be to avoid nuclear fall-out.)

Mimi said...

Thank goodness she has seemingly come to her senses. I hope that she stays that way until everything is legally settled. I still can't believe the $25000 price tag on the house, though. I mean... 25 grand! for a whole house!

Jess said...

She still sounds to me like she is not crazy at all, and knows that her brother is generally a nice, non-stubborn person who tends to give in to her, and thought it was worth a shot to see if she could make him do it this time. Which grosses me out.

I agree: no chicken counting yet. But maybe a little less stress, at least, in the meantime.

fairydogmother said...

I agree with Jess. And you. As usual.

And yet again all I really have to say about any of this is WOW!

Fortunately (or unfortunately) my crazy/stubborn/selfish/detached-from-reality family members pretty much live in other states. (On so many levels). And there are only a few of them. And most importantly, there has never been a joint estate/real estate/inheritance issue that had to be addressed.

Families, man!

CARRIE said...

I'm glad I'm not the only one with a crazy-ass SIL. What a soap opera.

wisdomandpeace said...

So relieved for you that there is at least a verbal agreement in place--good for Paul for sticking up for your family's interests!

Anonymous said...

I'm the first anonymous from last night. Sent you an email...

d e v a n said...

*fingers crossed*

Slim said...

Either she talked to someone who explained How Things Work in the Real World, or Paul secretly took the Godfather approach to negotiations and worked "brains" and "signature" into a discussion.
Or the crazy will be returning, and you can line the pockets of a lawyer.

Kate said...

Huh. Maybe you could sell some of your children to help her, too!

Geez. You are a much better sister-in-law that I would be in this case. May the power be with you, sisterblogger.