Samantha posted this question on Twitter about a second child: "How do you KNOW when you want another? I'M SO CONFUSED."
Note that she was not asking ME at all. She was asking Jonniker. Did this stop me from mulling the question? Er, no. And is it stopping me from answering it JUST AS IF IT HAD BEEN ASKED OF ME? Why, no! (Hi, Sam! I'm in ur Twitter, eavesdropping on ur conversations!)
So, second child! PART of it, I think, is very similar to deciding to have the first child: there is a leap involved. A feeling of, "We CAN'T KNOW if this is a good decision for us or not. It COULD be the best decision ever, or the worst, or anywhere in between. Given that we CAN'T KNOW, we will have to make a GUESS. And looking around us at other people who have had a first/second child and been glad they did, at least eventually, we're going to gamble that we too will be glad, at least eventually."
And part of it was an "on paper" kind of decision: what do we want Our Family to BE? A family with one child? A family with two children? What do we theoretically WANT?
And part of it is the same as ANY experience we're considering repeating: we answer the question, "Did the GOOD of this experience balance the BAD in a way that made it WORTH IT and make us want to REPEAT IT?"
If you've had a second child, how did you decide? Was it the same for you as it was for me---i.e., a combination of leap/gamble and theoretical want and worth-repeating-ness?
If you're considering a second child now, how are you working through the decision?
Life-improving products, part 4 - (Continued from part 1, part 2, and part 3.) Stearns Youth Life Vest (photo from Amazon.com). I’d been too scared to take the kids to any body of water oth...