You know what's a dumb idea, while dieting? THIS: "I'm kind of hungry. I think I'll go poke around in the kitchen cabinets and see what I want to eat." By the time your slow, slow brain is saying, "Wait. Hey. Wait. I don't think we're supposed to eat that," your fast clever tummy will be saying, "HA HA TOO LATE!"
Last night I was doing what people do when they're "spoiling for a fight," except I was spoiling for a CHEAT. I saw a cookie recipe that had four ingredients (Bisquick, box of pistachio pudding mix, canola oil, egg), and within 30 seconds I was in the kitchen making them and planning to eat the entire tray with a big cup of cold milk. And then the cookies came out AWFUL (not the recipe's fault: I used sugar-free pudding, which I knew probably wouldn't work because I'd read something about most artificial sweeteners losing sweetness during baking---but I had hopes, and also I had no regular pudding).
They had to be thrown out, and instead of feeling SAVED FROM MYSELF, I went around acting as if now the universe owed me an alternative cheat. If it hadn't been too late in the evening to start baking again, I would have. And the whole diet seemed stupid, and like it's wasn't working, and like it was taking way too long to be worth it.
But then other times, like this morning, I'm admiring the way my jeans are no longer just "less tight" but actually "loose," and I'm holding the waistband away from me the way they do in diet ads, and I'm thinking, "This WORKS. This is amazing. It is WORKING. I am CHANGING SIZE by FORCE OF WILL!" And I walk around all flouncy and cute, feeling like Miss Awesome.
What's frustrating to me is that I can't hang on to the "It is WORKING!" feeling when I'm having the "The universe owes me treats!!!" feeling. In fact, even now I am seeing my weight loss as some sort of debit card: I've paid ahead, and now I am owed all those calories. My jeans are loose; therefore I may eat a batch of brownies.
Life-improving products, part 4 - (Continued from part 1, part 2, and part 3.) Stearns Youth Life Vest (photo from Amazon.com). I’d been too scared to take the kids to any body of water oth...