Five of my very dearest friends are expecting children (all but one their first) and the baby (3 boys, 1 girl, and 1 unknown) showers are about to start...
I need HELP!
What does every new mom need? What can they not live without when the newborn arrives? What are good gifts for the baby? And maybe even the grandma or dad?!?
I'm dying over here.
My first shower is this coming weekend. I've been purchasing little outfits and such along the way when I find a great deal or sale. But I don't have anything major to show or give away... I want to do more than just get things off of the registry!
As far as price range goes... I'm open. Okay, I'm a true penny pincher & deal finder... but I know not all items are going to be able to be found on sale; sad-- but true. And... not only am I going to need gifts for the shower, but for when the baby arrives... those hospital visits, etc. etc. So I'll just pick & modify as necessary.
And I might need people to explain things... I'm a single girl... no nieces, nephews, or anything -- I might not know the baby supply code. But, I'm ready to spoil some babies & some mommies!
Well! Some parents receive more newborn outfits than their baby can ever use, and others get not one single outfit because everyone's heard that parents receive more newborn outfits than they can ever use. Some people have skilled friends and get a dozen hand-knitted baby blankets, and some people have non-crafty friends and get none. So you can see there is a "shot in the dark" aspect to this task. This is the nature of gift-giving.
Now I DO hope all of us already know that there is NO OBLIGATION to purchase from a registry. Registries are not some sort of ORDER that must be fulfilled. People are allowed to go out and buy anything they want to for the baby, without consulting the registry. The registry is to give ideas (to people who want to know), to inform people (who want to know) of your color/brand preferences, and to aid in avoiding gift duplication. Sometimes I have heard people--NOT YOU--bitching that it is "rude" to buy non-registry items, and that just about sends me TO THE MOON. The gift decision is ONE HUNDRED PERCENT up to the giver. If the parents receive something unwanted, the parents say, "Oh, how good of them to think of us!" and donate or quietly exchange the item WITHOUT huffing or whining or running to their rooms and slamming their doors. If the parents do not receive what they were hoping to get, the parents BUY IT THEMSELVES like grown-ups.
(Important Exception: If you have a tense discussion with someone about a particular item they think you need but you don't want to use--pacifiers, bottles, cloth diapers, swing, whatever--and then they buy it for you anyway, that IS rude. But it's rude because they're trying to coerce you into doing something, not because they didn't follow the
That having been said (and MEANT, so don't let me hear any BACKTALK), a registry is a great way to make sure you don't choose someone a bouncy seat when they already have one, or buy them a swing when they are philosophically opposed to swings, or get them something in a pattern that clashes with their vision for their nursery. What I like to do is get a copy of the registry and see if there's anything on there that appeals to me to buy. If it's all, like, $40 booties and $50 blankies and $400 bassinets, I branch out on my own.
I also take into account the family I'm buying for. Are they poor, and is this their first baby? I aim for practical, and I spend more than I might normally. Are they well-off, and do they pretty much have everything they need? I buy something fun for them to try, or I buy an enormous pack of diapers and tie a rattle to the ribbon.
I told Sara that people vary WILDLY in what they think makes the best baby gifts, so let her have it! And since I