Listen, I am not DIETING. I'm just thinking all the time about food and when to eat it.
Here is one of my many food issues (do any of us have fewer than, like, a dozen?): I don't plan what I'm going to eat ahead of time, and so by the time I’m thinking about what I'm going to eat, I'm on the prowl. My mind flickers over the possibilities (carrots and salads are quickly psshh'd aside) and latches tightly to "shortbread cookies with vanilla ice cream." YES.
So here is what I'm trying. Let's call this Attempt The First. I'm deciding ahead of time what the next thing I eat will be, and then when I'm hungry I eat it. So in the morning, I have a glass of water, because of nursing and because that’s a good way to begin anyway. Then I go about the day, and when I get hungry, the first thing I plan to have is coffee with Splenda and fat-free half-and-half. Don't tell me what they do to make it fat-free, because I don't want to know. I assume someone lost a soul over it.
Then, while I'm drinking the coffee, enjoying the way my knee now feels like jittering up and down rapidly, I decide what I'll eat next. I don't like bananas, but they're filling, and they're a good choice for earlier in the day when I have less food despair. So let's say I choose banana. I finish the coffee and go back to whatever I was doing. As I get hungrier, I think, "When I want something to eat, I can have a banana"--and I may have it whenever I want it, but I see if I can go just a LITTLE longer. Normally, pushing it too long would make me grab something like ice cream, but because I have in my mind that it will be a banana, it makes me feel it MUST be a banana. (This part may fail later. We'll have to see.)
I get hungry enough, and I eat the banana. While I am eating the banana and the hunger is low again, I decide what I'll eat next. Two scrambled eggs, say. And so I start again: I MAY have the eggs immediately if I want them--but I see if I can go a little longer. When I'm hungry, or feel like my resolve is weakening with regard to the bag of chocolate chips in the cupboard, I eat the eggs.
And so on.
In a bigger-picture way, I am allowing brownies. I don't PLAN to eat the brownies, the way I plan the banana. But I say to myself, "Oh, yes, you MAY have brownies! Yes, you may! But see if you can wait a LITTLE LONGER before baking them!" This is the kind of thing that may come crashing down on my head ("Nope! Can't wait!" *GLOM*)--or perhaps it will keep me from rebelling against my own rules the way I usually do with diets.
I'm on my third day of this, so it's too early to say if it will work long-term or even short-term, but it's working great for these first few days of trying not to eat QUITE so much.
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