August 29, 2007

YES I WOULD, KENT

Whenever I am getting overwhelmed, and my voice is getting increasingly shrill as I tell Paul all the things that are overwhelming me, he quotes one of our favorite lines from The Simpsons:

Kent Brockman (news anchor): So, professor, would you say it's time for everyone to panic?
Professor: Yes I would, Kent.

Paul condenses it down to "Would you say it's time to panic?," asked in a soothing, affectionate, backing-away-to-get-the-tranquilizer-darts tone of voice. Today I am leaning towards YES I WOULD, KENT.

Suddenly I am overwhelmed. Everything was fine, and now everything is not. I am so far behind on photos, I don't want to think about it or talk about it, and let's not think or talk about laundry, either. My friends are wondering if we're still friends. My mother-in-law is coming in two months, give or take a month, and I don't see any way to get the house cleaned for that visit. Books, movies, and magazines are piling up. My toenails need painting, a present needs wrapping, my hair needs cutting and coloring, brownies need to be made and eaten. I need to tell you about the dream I had about David Boreanaz. And now Henry wants to nurse again. YARRRRRGGG!

See? The toenail polish situation is dire. DIRE.
Also, will someone please replace hideous plaid loveseat kthanx.

44 comments:

Shannon said...

Ooohhh, I think it is just that sort of a Wednesday because I am in the same BOAT.

You can have my hideous love seat that is stained with you don't want to know and the pillows were chewed on by a long gone dog and the cushions are uneven (one is firm and one is soft). So lovely. I will trade fair and square.

Erin said...

OH MY GOSH, are those kiddos cute or what?! So cute. No one will notice the toe nails, or even the plaid loveseat with those cuties around. And is that Edward? I haven't seen a picture of him in a while. He's looking adorable.

g~ said...

Yes, the polish needs some work, but the shoes look pretty cute! So at least you have something.

g~ said...

Sorry to double comment, but Henry's cheeks are simply edible.

Shelly Overlook said...

Okay, those are some adorable kidlets you have there.

I'd settle for the David Boreanz dream and brownies. Oh wait, were you and David Boreanz eating brownies together in your dream? Naked? Now THAT is my kind of dream!!!

AndreAnna said...

It's the week - it's gotta be. I had an all-out meltdown yesterday. Went around the house like a madwoman cleaning and organizing. Mike just backed into a corner whimpering until I gave him a job to do, and then he helped without complaint. It was that kind of day.

The kids are so dang cute though - it has to make up for it a wee bit.

And please, don't get me started on David Boreanz. I have dreams I am Bones and he is Agent Booth on a weekly basis. We are one bad-ass team. Sigh.

Swistle said...

Shannon- I'm tempted. Ours has one side regular, the other side is broken so you sink down almost to the floor. No stains, though. At least, not that we can see on that fabric.

Erin- Yes, that's Edward! Elizabeth wanted to hold Henry, and then Edward wanted to be in the photo.

Shelly Overlook- If only.

Kelsey said...

Please, people will be so distracted by the abundance of cute, nothing else will be noticed!!! And if thinking that doesn't work, just keep breathing.

Kelsey said...

After several moments of confused gazing at the picture I finally found your foot! See, the cute kids are totally distracting.

Swistle said...

Andreanna- Clearly I need to start watching that series once I'm done with Angel.

Kelsey- Yeah, all those kids are PILED ON MY LAP. Because I DARED TO SIT DOWN. I need the footrest not for putting up my feet but for EXTRA STORAGE SPACE.

Kathi said...

Sorry you're overwhelmed--that is not a fun feeling. Maybe if you conquer the brownie-making/eating first you will have enough energy to take care of the rest.

jen said...

all of them are so cute. Your kids have such distinguished features too (no, that is NOT "hey those kids are pretty ugly right there..") :)

I've stopped cleaning for my MIL. It's been very liberating for me. She's the one who inspired me, too. Her house isn't always immaculate. I make sure the bathroom is clean, and the kitchen, and I sweep the toys to the other side of the house, and vacuum the floors but that's about it. The best part is I can get the husband to do 90% of that right there. :)

We have not one, but TWO plaid couches. You want them? You can keep all the toys you find inside...

Nellyru said...

I let my husband clean the house whenever his mom is coming over; he knows it's otherwise not getting done. She would never say anything, but he can't stand to let her know what a messy house we live in most of the time.

Mimi said...

Oh my gosh, but look at your beautiful boys!
Also, you should definetely move the making and eating of brownies WAY to the top of that list.

Mimi said...

I didn't mean to leave Elizabeth out of my last comment... she is adorable as well! I was just oogling at cutie pie Edward that I haven't seen before!

Omaha Mama said...

Cute, cute kids. I don't think I'd get anything done for the sitting and staring at all of my cutes kids if I were you. Oh, wait, that's what I do with my two!

But really, just breathe. Get some S-L-E-E-P. And go back to your goal of one thing per day. It will be okay. Maybe MIL's visit is timely because she'll be so much help! Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!!!!

Jenny H. said...

As we say here in the south...

kewtshooestellyurmommahey.

Mostly that was a reference to your shoes being super-cute! Wow, the bebe's are really getting big. They are all adorable! But I am sure you know that!

Number one priority? BROWNIES. Screw the housework. Must have chocolate...

Hair cut? Color? What is this of which you speak?! Wanna guess how long it's been since this mama has done either?

Don't even get me started on the frickin' furniture...

Me Today said...

That picture of the boys is adorable. Henry's camera face is just begging for some sort of cute/funny saying next to it, but I wasn't coming up with anything clever enough.
Have some brownies...all will be well.

Colleen said...

David Boreanaz. I could deal with a dream about him. Well... maybe. It would depend on which persona it would include. I mean... with the type of day you're having... the dream might have included David Boreanaz as Angeles... not good. And as Angel... maybe good... but only so much you can do there before you end up with Angeles. I'd hope for Booth. Then that could be a good dream. (I'm such a geek)

Me Today said...

After posting my previous comment I was thinking...did I just say boys? Sorry, I forget that there are girls in this world. I meant, "That picture of the CHILDREN is adorable." :)

Marie Green said...

I'm so overwhelmed too! How is it you always post exactly what I'm thinking, only much better said?

Just start with first things first- brownies. That will make everything else feel better.

Your kids, oh my, soooo cute. The twins are getting so big!

Penny said...

ooooh, I hope you get some brownies and toe painting time. I certainly have many of those moments. I forget how they resolve themselves, but they do.

Also: love all the various stages of baby stuff in the background - swing, gates, some kind of rolling toy. Hee!

Devan said...

oooh, cute littles!! SO CUTE!! Sorry about the toenails. I gave up painting mine. Make your MIL clean the house, she's coming to "help," right?

Alice said...

inside my head while reading that post:

oh, poor swistle! i can't imagine having to deal with so many little kids all day every day, and with a newborn too! the poor thing, i -- OMG LOOK AT THE CUTE LITTLE KIDS HEEE AWWWW SOOO CUUUTE *drool*

desperate housewife said...

Get the haircut first thing. All else, even brownies, can wait. My haircut made me feel SO much better and able to cope with life. (If possible, investigate eating brownies WHILE getting a haircut.)

Katie said...

Yes. Let's dub this the Wednesday from hell, shall we? I wish I could bring YOU brownies now! :)

There is just something about the horrible toenail polish, the horrible hair situation and the lack of photo organization (oh--and the lack of eyebrow tweezing or waxing) that just sends me OVER. THE. F@#KING. EDGE.

I am with you, Swistle! Tomorrow is a new day and this too shall pass.

Katie said...

Hey! I didn't even SEE the toenails in that picture. I had no idea what you were talking about. If you don't want Shannon's love seat, you can have mine that has been newly colored upon with Sharpie!!

Anonymous said...

Psshht. Your toes are fine. And I adore this slipcover on my own plaidy-plaid-plaid loveseat: http://tinyurl.com/3ajp8d
Target! Woo!
~ChelleBird

JMH said...

You can blame all of it on the full moon. I am a teacher and I can ALWAYS tell when their is a full moon based on the student's behavior. I think full moon = everything sucks.

Emblita said...

I had to go back and look for the toenails... and don't worry, mine look the same and I have only 1 child and a husband that does housework!
I did make brownies yesterday though... cheat brownies, the Betty Crocker kind. But I just added an extra egg and melted 70% chocolate into the batter and yummyness was had!
So, is there any possibility that you could take a part of a saturday to go to a hair salon. Leave Paul with most of the kiddies and just take Henry with you (for breastfeeding purposes). Because I know how good it feels to have freshly cut hair - I think it should be a womans prerogative to be allowed that at least every 3 months or so :p

Oh all the kids look adorable, so cute!

Black Sheeped said...

The full moon does make a difference. I agree. Pets act worse, people act worse, and when I worked at a nursing home the residents acted ca-razy during the full moon.

Speaking of furniture and crazies and being frustrated, yesterday evening J came down to the den and looked around at our current tv-viewing situation (an old chair from his parents first house and a computer chair--moving is awesome) and said, "Hey, do you want to go buy a couch right now?" And I said, "Yeah." So we did.

That's how yesterday was. Hopefully today is much, much better. I also vote for eating brownies while you run away for the haircut. I usually don't paint my toenails only because I don't like when the polish starts to chip, but I've found that putting on a pair of socks or closed toe shoes makes the problem go away temporarily for me. :)

Also, tell your cats lovingly that they are assholes, because that always makes ME feel better.

Black Sheeped said...

PS. Those kids all have fabulous faces.

Michelle said...

Don't the men realize that if you are tranquilized, all that stuff WON'T GET DONE? Because who else will do it?

Please gnaw on the adorable baby a little. I miss gnawing on chubby baby, am left with leaner-by-the-minute toddler.

And I second the getting-a-haircut-first-thing suggestion. Everything else seems manageable when I look pretty.

Michelle said...

Don't the men realize that if you are tranquilized, all that stuff WON'T GET DONE? Because who else will do it?

Please gnaw on the adorable baby a little. I miss gnawing on chubby baby, am left with leaner-by-the-minute toddler.

And I second the getting-a-haircut-first-thing suggestion. Everything else seems manageable when I look pretty.

Jennifer aka Binky Bitch said...

Yep, I agree with SDHW, get the haircut. Haircuts cure many woes.

I think you're amazing, by the way. I only have 2 kids and my toenails aren't painted. And! You make some pretty babies!

LoriD said...

When I'm having one of those moments, my ever-supportive husband makes a whistling sound. Like a pressure cooker about to blow its top.

Gorgeous kids, by the way!

Mommy Daisy said...

Love the picture of the younger kids. They are so cute together. And that's so loving of Elizabeth to want to hold Henry. Does she try to help with him a lot?

I'm glad I'm not the only one with overwhelming days. Sometimes it seems like it won't end, but then I start to see the light. Brownies will help.

I only have one child and my toenails are horrid right now. This is the second summer in a row that I've only worn socks and tennis shoes. I just can't keep up otherwise. And I cut my hair about twice a year if I'm lucky. Just can't find the time to do it.

And pictures? What do you do with your pictures? Do you put them in albums, scrapbook? Just curious. I've tried to put together a few albums since I had my son, but I'm about 9 months behind right now. Will I ever catch up?

How DO you keep up with all of that and 5 kids? I think a break-down is deserved.

Farrell said...

Girl, I have ONE and I have days like that all the time. YOU have many more excuses than I, like multiple children and NURSING an INFANT.
Hopefully hubby will pitch in and give you a indulging day to get your hair and nails done ALL BY YOURSELF.
Also: laundry NEVER ends. Ironing is hell.

Swistle said...

Mommy Daisy- I use "pocket" albums (I mean the kind where the photos slip into pockets, not the pocket-SIZED kind) and I cram the photos in. I'm motivated to keep up so I can send my far-away in-laws photos--but I still keep slipping behind. I thought digital photography would be better, and it IS--but it also means all the cropping and adjusting, and of course I take a zillion more photos when they're digital. AAAIIIIIIEEEEE.

Welcome to our World said...

OMG, I feel the same way but I only have one! I wish I could help out!

I too need a pedicure. My purplish color is not so pretty - in fact it is chipped and dull. YET I still walk around with it. Hair color? Hmm, well that has been since before my son was born... And I stopped getting my hair cut because my stylist moved away and I am scared to find some new... Meet Cousin It over here in IN.

The kiddos are adorable though - thanks for sharing!!!

Jen said...

Wow, those are some cute kids.

I think I should just cut and copy your post to my blog. I have been feeling a bit overwhelmed lately, too, WITH ALL THOSE SAME ISSUES. Mmmm, maybe it's that mini-pill????

mamaDB said...

Yeah, I fifth getting the haircut first. I need to take that advice as well. I can't handle my day-to-day sometimes with two kids. You hold it together with 5 and I admire that.

Oh, and the toes, when I first read it I thought it was some mythical reference to your toes, it took me a good while to notice your foot in the picture and the plaid beast (a term of endearment in our house - we have one too). The ridiculously cute kids really distract one from noticing the unpainted toe nails.

Sara said...

Bad toes or no, that is a cute bunch of littles. And I dig the trendy green sandals.

Hope you are feeling better--

Tessie said...

God, this is how I feel right now. In theory, we are "on vacation", but I feel like I'm on a tilt-a-whirl or something.

And,we have to fly BACK too! SERENITY NOW!

I was so pumped to see those pics of the big kids!