August 20, 2007

I Earned TWO Pans of Brownies

So I was like, "Whine whine whine," and you were all, "Don't blow this, bitch You can do it, sweetie!" First I thought, "You know, I could say I ran, and they would not even know." Then I tried to reason that I'd rent a workout video from Netflix to do instead of the running, and then of course I wouldn't be able to do it until it arrived so I could relax tonight, and tomorrow, and the next night, and perhaps the rest of the week. Then I thought, with the grim stillness that descends on me when I realize a toddler has barfed in the car and there's no one to handle it but me me me, that all of you who said I'd better just go and do it were probably right.

And so I pulled in strength from my two inspirations: some guy Tessie and I would like to hit in the face, who said that no one ever came back from a workout saying, "Gee, I wish I hadn't done that" (perhaps some of you with sports injuries would like a word with him?); and Matthew McConaughey, who says "Every day I try to be photographed showing off my oiled and certainly not gay muscles break a sweat," and I went and I ran.

I didn't try to follow a day in the program but instead just walked and jogged at will. I switched to walking whenever I started wondering which god was the one I should pray to for a Mercifully Fatal Bolt From Heaven. When I caught my breath and started thinking, "Hmeh, I'm an agnostic anyway," I switched back to jogging.

I'm glad I went. People talk about endorphins, and I assume what they mean is the wave upon wave of smugness and relief.

24 comments:

Omaha Mama said...

Smugness and relief. That describes what working out does for me to a T! So...has it affected you positively between jogs? (Baby weight, energy, flab, etc...)

And how's about some Henry pics??? (Greedy, I know).

Jess said...

Yay! You did it! Thank god. Now I will have someone to complain to when I wheeze my way back from the gym tomorrow night. I'm very impressed with your willpower.

Swistle said...

Omaha Mama-- So far the only physical change I've noticed is that I'm starting to FEEL the muscles, if you know what I mean. No other good stuff: I've actually GAINED a few pounds (I'm SURE it's that jogging doesn't work, and has nothing to do with brownie consumption), and I don't think it's improving my energy levels.

Okay, pics soon!

Swistle said...

Jess-- Your comment on the last post was VERY INFLUENTIAL in my decision to run tonight!

Devan said...

swistle - muscle weighs more than fat, so maybe you can go on eating brownies and just say you've gained a lot of muscle. ;)
Good for you for doing it!! I have to get up super early and do it in the morning. I don't wanna and it's going to be hard to convince myself to do such...

Jess said...

I'm glad I helped, and that you felt good about it afterward! Also, now you have turned around and motivated me to make sure that I go to the gym tomorrow evening even though I get home later from my new job than I did from my old one. See, we are helping each other!

Also, at some point (possibly tomorrow), I think that I too may convert from strictly following the workout plan to just running and walking at intervals. I'm not as interested in being able to run a 5k per se as I am in getting regular exercise and burning some fat. But we'll see how it goes.

Artemisia said...

Good for you - that is awesome willpower! I like that you drew parallels to the determination you have to summon to deal with kids' barf. Awesome. I feel like such a grown up when I deal with Buster's doggie puke.

I did it!! I did it!! I went for my first run of the First Week!!

And YOU (and the other commenters participating in the program) were my inspiration!

THANK YOU!

But, GEEZUZ! Why, why, why am I thanking you?!?!?! My left knee hurts, my WRIST hurts (WTF????)...

And I only sort of did the first run. I only jogged/walked for 10 minutes. But I walked 3 miles in addition!

THANK YOU!!

laughing mommy said...

You rule!

I'm so glad to hear that I'm not the only one struggling with the C25K program this week. I'm going to start week 4 tomorrow and I'm SCARED about the 5 minute run.

mamaDB said...

alright already. I'll start tomorrow. You've done it. You've convinced me. Only my program will be called "Licking bottom of mint chocolate chip brownie pan to 5K"

Good job going today!

Erin said...

Yay for you! You totally earned the brownies. And now you'll know you CAN do it, even when you absolutely know you canNOT. A little smugness and relief are good for the soul.

Katie said...

I hate those little bastard endorphins. They never show up for me either.

Jennifer aka Binky Bitch said...

I suppose I should get off my ass and back into running. Damn endorphins, but the smugness, oh the smugness!

Penny said...

Good for you! Who knew Matthew McConaughey's gay muscles would come in so handy.

Tessie said...

The main reason *I* can think of for you to keep running is the continued existence of these HI-larious entries!

And you're right, endorphins is really just a synonym for "smug feeling of superiority over non-runners, including your former self".

And if I find out that Matthew is gay, we're going to need a new name for my "body pillow".

Black Sheeped said...

Man. I know that guy is a dipshit, but I love it when he sweats. I was entranced during all of A Time to Kill, purely because of his oiled/sweaty skin.

In other news! Good for you! Hooray!

Shelly said...

You rock!

& not just b/c of the brownies either.

You're making me feel worse about my lazy tired self every day. Still isn't getting me running, but I am walking and calling it good. For now.

MrsGrumpy said...

Way to go! I am actully feeling guilty enough to almost go back to the gym I promised myself I would visit at least 3x a week last March.

Alice said...

i always assumed that's what people meant when they said you "never regret" working out or "always feel great" after working out: that you in fact felt SMUG because DO YOU SEE THIS SWEAT? I AM SWEATING. BEHOLD! and not because, like, my actual BODY felt great.

Swistle said...

Jess-- I'm with you: I'm beginning to think that "exercising for 30 minutes" is a greater priority than "doing this particular program."

Tessie-- I GAGGED with laughter. PROBABLY he's not gay. PROBABLY. But his ex-girlfriends are always so nice about him. And he is SO PREENY AND NAKED. Incidentally, my brother looks a lot like M. McC. But not bulky-muscley. And not gay. And in fairness, his ex-girlfriends are nice about him, too.

Kristin said...

You did it! That's so great! When I don't feel like it but know I really should go, I promise myself that I'll at least start, and quit whenever I get tired. Even if I only go for one minute, at least I went and did it. I always feel better about that than copping out completely. I think your plan of doing just some exercise, rather than following The Plan to a T is a good one, especially if it works better for you.

Jess said...

PLUS as an extra reason to stick with the walking/running combo instead of trying to run for 30 straight minutes, interval training where you let your heart rate slow down a little bit between pumping it up again is actually supposed to burn more fat than just pure hardcore training. Because if you just run without any walking intervals, your heart rate will get above its optimal fat burning zone.

Jess said...

I just did my second week three workout, and oh my god, it was worse than the first. I was trying out different options with my new work schedule and attempted an early dinner and a late gym run, but I have learned that that is SO not a good idea. Apparently I have less energy after 8 p.m., because you know how I was dead last time? This was nine billion times worse. They had to peel me off the treadmill.

Misty said...

All you working-out, exercisey people make me sick.

*Insert Evil Eye*

Darn your motivation and initiative. And darn my lack thereof.

Jess said...

I just did my third week three workout, and while it was still incredibly miserable, it was SO MUCH EASIER than when I went late in the evening on Tuesday. It is scary that something this hard can actually be referred to with the term "easy," even if it's in relative terms.

Anyway, I am pretty much positive that I'm not ready for week four (three minutes of running TWICE plus FIVE MINUTES OF RUNNING TWICE), so I"m going to repeat the week three workout this weekend. Then next week we'll see about week four.